Yesterday I sat in one traditional wedding celebration, and while everyone danced and cheered, I sat back and just looked at everyone.
Curious to know thats on their minds, what were they thinking, feeling..
&I was indugling in that thought, until I was asked to dance and be part of it, and something in me felt like this is a culture and place I don’t belong in.
It wasn’t the first time that it crossed my mind, and I cannot deny how I constantly feel like I was placed in a place that had different thinking and values than the one I have. I truly felt like an outcast.
There is this longing feeling to be somewhere that feels like home, to be with people that understand you and share your values, people who embrace the true meaning of islam without being conqured with their culture’s belief, somewhere where islam isn’t done forcefully, but understood well enough to go with the way life works.
I kept searching for that ‘home’ feeling in my own home and culture, but something in me doesn’t catch up or fit in this whole puzzle that my family and culture has.
There isn’t anything wrong or bad in the culture, except that some of the culture belief conflicts with islam’s nature. Its selectively choosing which rules they should and shouldn’t follow and if you have evidence to prove them wrong, they’ll take it as the belief of it being ‘out of the norm’ or ‘disrespect’ or simply ‘going against your parents will’.
This place isn’t my home and it will never will be and now I know why, because this whole place is just the dunya, its just the time to pass by this life to be ready for the real home, my home, my future, my Jannah.
I will always long for you my sweet home, thats where my heart truly belongs in, my home, my Jannah.
Pray about everything, talk to God. Just let it out, all the good, all the bad. He’s always listening, prayer does change things. Even if you think God isn’t listening, let me tell you he always is. He’s always working on something for you. Breathe & ask for forgiveness and also forgive others. Remember, tomorrow is a brand new day. Start fresh & clean.
Today, I woke up after feeling sick and tired, and falling ill, I woke up with no messages, no one to say hello, and this is the part where in a typical movie where the next line to say is ‘my existence doesn’t matter to anyone’ but no, I woke up feeling grateful that I am a muslim.
Because, even though I woke up with the silence, He was always there for me, He was there when my days were good and He is there when my days have gone into so many shades of bad.
But bottom line, He was always there, through good and bad, when I needed a friend he brought me those who even lived so far away and got me colleagues I barely talk to that made sure I was smiling.
He blessed me all the time, through out the good and bad.
He was always there and I know, thats all I need to keep me happy.
Because He will send me the people I need the moment I need them, He will bless me with the oppurtinities I need whenever I need to take them, and He will never ever put me in a situation unless He knows its best for me.
Truly, Allah is the only prefect one.
- Ibn Ul Qayyim (via alongcamenad)
- Imam Ibn Al-Qayyim (via getilm)
Those words are the last words a father’s to his dead daughters who killed by Bashar al-Assad and his supporter army with chemical weapon attack.
Almost 2000 innocent people died at this attack. Most of all, 0-10 years old children. Most of them, killed while they are sleeping. They couldn’t wake up for a new day.
There’s no words to explain this massacres. You don’t have to be a Syrian or Muslim to support this people. This can be happen to you, one day. We don’t know what’s gonna happen to us. Please, share this with everyone. Please.
[NOTE: My english is pretty bad but I hope you’d get it.]
I can’t even begin to imagine a fraction of their pain :/ Ya Rabb.